Thursday, January 8, 2009

Lovely Thoughts

I have been thinking a lot about love lately. One of my friends at Olive Garden, Cole, once told me that he had been thinking for several days about love - what is it really? At the time, I just grunted as I was "weeded" (a waitering term for overwhelmed with one's duties) but afterwords I thought it was probably the deepest question I'd ever heard there. What is love? It seems we often recognize it when we see it, but to try to describe it is so very difficult. A few random thoughts on love that I have come across lately:

-Everyone has a love bank account for everyone we come in contact with. When someone meets one of our needs, love units are deposited. When they don't meet our needs, love units are withdrawn. Eventually if too many units are withdrawn, a person moves from love to hate. This is the theory of Dr. Willard, F. Harley, author of His Needs, Her Needs and Love Busters. Jobina and I read his book to each other in the van while travelling this Christmas - very good stuff. Harley works mostly with couples experiencing infidelity - a very tough group! Yet he finds that by teaching warring spouses to begin meeting each others needs again, he can help them to rebuild their love bank balances - which results in feelings of love where once there was hate. Yes, love is a feeling, a choice, and a verb. But according to Harley it is also tangible - something that can be added to and subtracted from - at least when humans are involved. I thought his concept of love to be quite interesting.

-Sometimes even animals seem to exhibit love (I dedicate this one to Lindsey) :



-Love can get you into trouble: Child Elopers African Plan Foiled.

Love. Isn't it marvelous?

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